i lost my will to write?

i have just got lazy. in my thoughs i just had no energy to think of any writing. i have done nothing. i should be happy that noone wonts anything from me. then i worry why dont anyone wont anything from me. my phone is silent noone calls. i speak my mind and then i am discumkated from everyone. my husband turned to me and said i think i am a loner. i said to him well ok but you cant go a day without speaking to anyone and getting parnoia thoughts of doom doom. ha. i on the other hand have no choice as when i try to speak to someone i just get silence. i do like silence with my own thought. i am pleased to be breathing and pleased that their are nature and trees. i apresiate the effert it takes to pump blood round my veins. i have a life alone and i need to make the most of what is around us. life does not need to be that hard. you get up and breath.